Mass Effect: An Impossible Goal
by ReaperTheVigilante
Summary: Rated M for sexual content, strong violence, and use of alcohol. In this story, I wanted to introduce a criminal known as the Bug. He has bad luck with his heists, and tends to lie a lot. Now, in order to raise his reputation, he plans on stealing something that's very important to the Alliance.


Hello, my name is the Bug. Don't ask why they call me that. Anyways, I'm of the greatest, unnoticed throughout the entire universe. I just have some... bad luck riding on my back. As for my lifestyle, I like to spend all of the money I've uh... "permanently borrowed" on beer, new equipment, and prostitutes. Also, who could forget those delicious Quarian and Asari ladies. Babes, if you want to hook up with me, just look for the guy that looks like a spy and has a mask that resembles a praying mantis. That's what I look like. Right, I'm off topic here. My skills are unmatched by many of the citizens here on Omega. People like Aria T'Loak, Zaeed, and Commander Shepard are inferior towards me, plus I only let them catch me so I can trick them into thinking that I'm weak. I'm much more stronger than they are, I just don't want to embarrass them with my amazing strength. In fact, that's the kind of situation that's happening between me and Aria T'Loak.

"Fucking human," a Krogan snorted as he gave me a hard kick to the face. "Can't you pay for a hooker yourself," Aria asked me as she remained still while looking at me with that same hard-ass look on her face. I coughed up blood inside my mask, and sat up on the hard floor of the club known as Afterlife. "I thought she wanted me," I groaned as I started to rub my head from all of those kicks and punches. "Apparently, you need to start reading the body language of women before you touch one of my dancers' ass," Aria growled. "Grizz, get this fucking moron out of my sight." The Turian known as Grizz chuckled as started to lift me up. "With pleasure, ma'am," Grizz snickered. That Turian bastard was a helluva lot stronger than I thought. He threw me out of the club faster than you can count to five. "And stay out, you damn creep," Grizz yelled. He then went back inside the club, and the door closed with a loud hissing sound. "Yeah, well... I can find my own fun. I'll um... do something that's far greater than Omega has ever done," I taunted, knowing that Grizz wouldn't be able to hear me.

"Take a hike, pal," one bystander insulted as he hurried towards home. Knowing that my day of mischief had ended, I proceeded towards my somewhat decent apartment that was near the quarantined zone. "Stupid, stupid dancer. 'Get your damn hands off of me, you sleazy bastard!' Well, I'll show you how sleazy I can be," I complained as I stumbled towards my door. I must admit, I did have a little too much to drink on that day, so maybe that was the cause of my banishment from Afterlife.

As I tried to get into my apartment, I noticed that Aria had locked my apartment. It was probably payback for that incident with the dancer. "God dammit," I grumbled as I activated my omni-tool, and tried to hack the lock. I heard the footsteps of my neighbors who loved across from me. It was that old lady and her artistic daughter. Nice neighbors. They never really bothered me much. I turned around, and witnessed them staring at my crime. "What are you two bitches looking at," I slurred my speech. They immediately went inside their apartment, hoping to avoid conflict. "Yeah! That's right! Go inside, and have a... uh have a uh... aw forget it," I exclaimed. I finally succeeded in hacking the entrance to my apartment. For now, it was time for a little rest and relaxation in my home. My apartment wasn't really nice, but then again I could be living on the streets of Omega. I tried my best to get to my bedroom, but I kept on tripping on all of my shit that I have to pick up. I finally made to my bedroom after tripping at least ten times. My bedroom had posters of women in bikinis, a few of my stun grenades on the table, and a blowup doll. What!? I get lonely sometimes! OK. Back to the story now. I plopped down on my soft, cozy bed, and tried my best to ignore the sounds of my next door Turian neighbor having sex with his Latin girlfriend. Ain't no place like home, eh?


End file.
